A Correlation - A Sister’s Role in the Family

Every now and then someone would ask, ‘What can we do to attract our young people. Are our talks catchy enough, or we divulging the right information, what can we do to keep them?’ On the one hand there are some who feel that our kids are spoilt; they can sit for three hours and watch a movie without once getting up, but can’t sit still in the meeting for one hour, so it’s all a matter of discipline; they should know that ‘church’ is important and be expected to rally out.

On the other hand - some feel that kids should be allowed to make their own decisions, if they are not interested in a religious way of life then maybe one day, when they are older, they will develop an interest. In the meanwhile we should try and keep them entertained, going to all lengths, even if it means relaxing some of the scriptural principles.

And not only the kids, but we as adults, do we require various forms of ‘entertainment’ to keep our attention at the meeting, or to bring us to the meeting for that matter. I was thinking of possible reasons when it would be okay to miss a meeting. Some of the ‘good’ ones are, Oh I have to prepare a talk, after all, it’s a Bible class I have to prepare and so it is okay if I stay home today and get my talk done.

Or, A close relative is getting married and they would be very upset if I did not go to the wedding. In some parts of the world weddings are still done on a Sunday by some religious groups. And so the reasoning is, Well, since they are only getting married once, (well so they say) then I can skip the meeting this week. Some not so good reasons, Well my non-religious relatives are over, and I cannot leave them to go and serve God! Or perhaps you just wake up late and simply cannot make it!

The young people are watching us! They will emulate what they see. This is what I have seen growing up in the truth. When I think about all the families that I have been around, either at the meeting or in their homes, I see a startling correlation between the spiritual dedication of the female leader in the home and the attitude of the children to ecclesial life.

By no means am I attempting to excuse the male, he could be an excellent brother, does his Bible study, gives good talks, is even an arranging brother; however, when he does not have the support of a sister to help him to motivate the children in a spiritual direction we see less and less of the children and, in some cases, the grandchildren appear. I know we frown upon our young females when they fall into this pattern, however since boys do not get pregnant, they escape that predicament.

But back to our mothers. In almost all of the families that I have known, where mom was completely behind the kids - bringing them to the meeting from birth, not distracted by the annual awards event at school, not giving in to the whines about not feeling well today - those little boys and girls are assisting in nurturing their meetings and are fully supportive of all their activities.

On the other hand, where the mom is more concerned about whether Sam will get into Harvard, or the extra lesson on a Sunday or during the mid-week Bible class, so that Raj can top his county, or allowing Sandy to miss Sunday School because it’s her grand performance at the Majestic Piano Finale, that is exactly where the kids are today - not at the meeting but everywhere else. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, and by no means am I trying to lay blame solely on the mother. I am simply pointing out my observations over the years. And I cannot help but notice a strong correlation between these two factors.

Perhaps it’s because children tend to gravitate towards mom’s feelings more so than towards dad’s. So, since we live in an age where females are becoming more and more influential, may I suggest that following the advice of Paul in 1 Tim. 5.14 our mothers bring and keep the future brothers and sisters at our meetings.

Bro Ben Drepaul (New York, USA).

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